Gibberish 11

by zee

1. I would like to play some songs to match this hmm rather melancholic (?) (so overused; better get a new word) mood tonight, but I’m just too lazy to open a new tab –> Hence the silence.

2. I like talking to people – get their insights, know more about their lives, extract some useful information (hoho) – but I am afraid of talking to them as well #shy. I’m afraid of making mistakes, of looking silly, of asking stupid questions – wait, I do that all the time. Is that my ego talking?

3. Suddenly the future seems so… bleak/bright. There are so many things I can do, but I’m afraid of making rash decisions (which I often do), ending up making regrettable mistakes. What if it lead me to an absolutely terrible life? What if I hate my decision and have to live with it for the rest of my life? So scared.

4. I have plans. Actually no I don’t have a plan, I have decisions I am waiting to make, when the time comes. See, I just am not proactive like that. I don’t create opportunities; I wait for them. Gee, I’m so weak.

5. Anyways. Yes, I  have plans. It may seem crazy to some, but entirely “conservative” to people of the other side of the spectrum.

6. Point 4 also leads me to this: I really should stop thinking I’m more superior than others. I’m sorry if I confuse you with my inferior & superior complexes. There are no human qualities that define whether one is more superior than the other. #keepinmind

7. Does it make me a brat/princess if I say my goal in life is to travel all around the world, see things, eat food, talk to people, sing, dance, laugh? Does it sound weird to you if I say money is not my first priority; and I actually am minimalistic in so many ways, including the amount of disposable cash I have? Is it weird to be this idealistic? Does it imply that I’m childish, immature; that I should grow up and get a proper job and work my ass off until the end of the world?

8. Does it make me seem weird if I say marriage is not in my plan, that I find it intimidating (yeah thanks to my readings lolol)? Why do people want to get married in the first place? *frown*

9. Side note: check out the guy behind Humans of New York! Really love that FB page. I love how it’s able to show you how much stories everyone has – which further reinforces Point 6.

10. Speaking of cameras: I need to get myself a mirrorless camera.

11. Aside from Point 10: I think this calls for an identity formation.

Good night, folks!