by zee

As Long As You Love Me (acoustic), Justin Bieber

When we were still a little younger, more naive & happy-go-lucky, friends were our best companions for literally everything we do. If we needed someone with us to the toilet/game/tuition classes/extracurricular activities/hang out, we could definitely count on them.

As we grow up, our lives start to be broken up into boxes, all of which dedicated to different people with some overlapping. You have friends who:

  • …go for a jog with you but not movie marathons.
  • …go for a swim with you but not dive with the sharks at the islands.
  • …go to concerts with you but not go to gigs & music festivals.
  • …gossip about everyone in your class and talk about relationship problems with you but not discussing about philosophy. (Side note: philosophy seems to feed my soul, just like the way religion feeds yours :O)
  • …sing karaoke and do mani-pedi with you but not have heart-to-heart talks.

Shipping containers in port of Rotterdam | image source:

I guess a more appropriate way to put this is that branches such as this will occur as we start to identify our likes & dislikes, personalities & values, priorities & ambitions. In fact, I am on the exact journey of identifying myself #ZeeGoingInwards so I do understand the importance of giving ourselves a firm identity and not just follow the flow.

As paradox as it may sound, though, I am a bit saddened that there still are aspects of my life that I have to go through alone, like watching unpopular(?) movies or NOT watching Asian dramas wtf or going to elective classes; or forego, e.g. gigs & music festivals, travelling.

Sometimes it can get lonely and tiring to do things by yourself. You have no one to share your thoughts & feelings, and/or having to go through the same cycle again of building rapport & connections that most likely will not last #eh #shy Being the one always to take the initiative can wear you off as well. There are times you just wish to shut down that adventurous part of your brain/heart and just take the easy, comfortable route (though it can be soul-damaging as well #eh).

Well, rants aside, one should always strive to improve our own conditions, no?